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the tears won't stop..
well, i guess it's time. i have not talked to anyone about this i really should live away from everything no internet no going anywhere that way, i can't get hurt right ? as for friends thanks for smiling whenever seeing me thanks for talking to me randomly thanks for waving if you've been there for me a greater thanks sadly, i have nobody now. the people i used to go to have their own problems i shan't bother them with mine that's why, being alone ain't such a bad idea right ?
i don't know who to look for now i really need someone to talk to now having 1015 friends on facebook, don't mean anything cos on fb, everybody is your 'friend' i have too many 'friends' and too little friends now who do i have i have great sisters i have great brothers none of which, i want to bother now burden them with my 'unimportant things' well, if they're unimportant i wouldn't be crying like some jerk you'll never know even a small 'cheerup! :x' can make me feel hopeful.
i know i have to be strong and this is just a part of life tell me, how do i do that ? i see in front of me blood, tears, my phone not lighting up. i realise i depend alot on texts and friends to survive to get along with life in that case, is texting a friend that hard to do ? it may seem nothing to you but it can very well make my day. try it. i may love you and if i do love you, you won't regret a single hell of it.
argh i can't even type a single post properly i have to wipe my face after every line i wonder how you feel now great ? you miss him so fucking much don't you quoted from you well, i'm thinking of living my life alone myself, well maybe text some friends but definitely no more fb or anything sounds great to you doesn't it ? i hope you find your precious guy the one you miss so much and maybe even get back together with him ? since i bet that's what you dream of goodluck with that i wish you the very best don't go treating him like how you treated me endure him, no matter how wrong cos that's what's important in a relationship you don't give up on everything, just because of some mistakes your other half makes regardless big or small i'm crying harder than i've cried in a long time guess the song my media player is playing is contributing alot to it without you - chris brown emo much it's been so long since i shed a single tear and now, i believe i shed at least a pail ? but yeah. i don't expect you to understand that you have your life you don't have to care about mine me getting back to you taking care of you with all my might i guess all these was just a fantasy whoever you get together with in the future just don't treat him, like how you treated me i don't know if you'll find a guy with so much commitment as me or not but i hope so i'm not thinking highly of myself i'm not saying i did alot for you, and i deserve credit i'm saying i loved you. more than anything. i put everything i had into us i gave up many things for us i want to tell my children, that my greatest love is their beloved mother guess i can't do that if they ever ask me i'll tell them our lovely story about how we met same school, same cca where we went together how i so easily got angry, and how you managed to stay so calm the feeling when we could say i love you after a long argument forget this children thing i'm thinking too much i should be thinking of poa my papers in 2 days time and i'm still here crying like shit
i don't know what to say anymore.. everything is stuck in my mind.. many many things.. hai.. guess i'll just stare at my phone, and wait for some random person to text me..
don't try and perfect yourseslf for one person. wait for the one person that loves your imperfections. well, i changed myself for you. so that i would be perfect in your eyes..
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